if we were to...

I'm sorry.

I know that it's just an apology.

But I mean it.

I am.

The thought that you,

Might hate me,

For telling the truth,

Would hurt me more,

Then the pain I feel,

Whenever I cut myself.

I held it in.

I waited too long.

And now it's pouring out.

I'm sorry,

That this is all had to happen.

I'm sorry,

That this is what it's all about.

The way you treated me.

The way I loved you.

I felt it was unfair.

But I never thought that urting myself,

Would make the thing seem weird.

I never knew,

That what I did,

Was paining everyone.

I tried so hard,

To help myself.

I didn't think,

Of anyone else.

I was trying so hard,

Not to be selfish.

But In the making,

I was.

I'm sorry that I hurt you.

I'm sorry that I did.

And I know I'll never be forgiven;

This is a bad timing,

I know it is,

Believe me.

But the feelings just can't stay hidden.

My friends always said,

That I should cute,

Because that way,

The pain won't spread.

The emotional pain,

Is always worse,

Than any physical pain,

I've experienced.

But really the emotional pain,

Goes even higher,

When I do,

Cut myself.

The burden,

The pain,

The life that they hold.

I'm sorry that they,

Could not behold,

The meaning in which,

They felt that way.

Because if they hadn't,

I would be upstairs,

Cutting myself.

Every day,

I come home and call,

Then I sit down,

With a knife.

I pick it up,

And bring it down hard,

Cutting my skin.

I never thought,

It would be so hard.

The card I drew,

Just happened to be,

The last card in the deck,

Which should be me,

The one they throw away.

But thanks to friends,

And having a heart,

I stopped being the one,

To create a mark.

The scars are stuck there,

They're part of my past;

And now I live freely,

Because I have passed.

I love you so much,

And I'm sorry for the pain.

I never meant to harm you,

All the same.

I'm sorry,

That you had,

To experience this talk.

I'm sorry that I,

Couldn't take the walk.

I gladly said no,

To everything else.

But when it came to this,

I couldn't think of to resist.

I crid all alone;

I felt so tired;

I cut my wrists,

Just so I could retire,

From the pain,

That caused heartbreak.

But now I realize,

That all that sorrow,

All of that worry,

Went straight to you.

And now I cry,

And I don't want to be comforted.

I dont' deserve the sorry's,

I deserve the pain.

I'm sorry.